We, humans, are bound to stupidity like a mountain is bound to being immovable. It is written into our daily life. It is what kind of stupid, what flavor of ignorance we follow, that defines who we are.
If you are stupid academically, if you have failing grades or don't exert yourself in classes...people will judge you. They will assume you are immature. You're a damn fool for not trying, not lining up the way they do and writing note for note what "X" is.
If you are stupid with talking, your folks might cast you out. They'll become angry that you don't talk to them, confused as to why you're always sleeping, and hoping you're okay. The friends you have will wonder about you most days. They'll try to incite some sort of spark in you to get you to speak up or talk about how you're feeling. They'll want to know if you're okay..
If you are stupid with sex, you will be in a world of hurt. Sex is an integral part of our being. It's the reason we exist. If you think of it like some sort of game, and play around with the fire it creates between you two....you will be hurt. There are those out there that use sex as a form of part-time entertainment. Going woman to woman, man to man, looking for a thrill. To each his own, ultimately it doesn't affect me. Though, I might question how genuine of a friend that same person is going to be with me. Are they just going to use me for a thrill? Sexual misconduct can be the bird that lands on the car, precariously teetering on the cliffside. It can be the difference between a girl with a couple of male friends, and an attention whore. It can be the difference between lifelong partners and tyrant baboons screaming at each other over missed child support and visitation rights. Treat it like it is, a skeleton key. A key that can open many, many doors. Study the doors, and where they're going to take you.
If you are stupid in love, then you could be blissfully ignorant. Both of you could be that way, and as time goes on there will be many bridges you will cross. Not many of those bridges will be stable. Hopefully, with effort, you won't remain stupid in love. You will grow, and you will become a better partner. This is all assuming that you were brought up well, that you don't have any baggage already dragging you down. As you grow, you will watch them grow too. As they grow, ignorance may give way to regret.
Regret for not saying those things you should have. Regret for not holding her when you had the chance. Regret for not asking what's wrong.
Regret will give way to pain. There are many ways to deal with pain, some are healthier than others. If love is a 4 lane highway, that spans your entire lifetime, she and yourself are two cars. You're both travelling the same speed, going in the same direction, and at first...both of you hope to the same destination. At first, you're both racing to the destination, bolting forward. Both of your cars are shiny, they haven't seen much road and you only see the good parts of your partner. The further you develop, you both gain and miss opportunities. A shinier car rolls by, or a bump in the road comes up that shakes the hell out of you and her. In time, you two find it hard to see what you once saw in each other. With so much dirt on your tires, and that crack in the windshield, it's hard to even see good in yourself...let alone her.
This is where many people have difficulty. To deal with this pain, you can either stop completely, break apart and move into those two adjacent lanes next to yourselves, or continue together on the road. Any way you travel, you're still travelling, and the destination is still there. If your destination was a happy future, its still there. Many people will simply choose to break up at this point and try to start fresh. The pain, the dirt, the crack...they're still there. But maybe if you try hard, the next car won't see them.
You can't remain happy without taking a few rest stops. Clean a car, but don't clean your own. Clean each others cars.
It's one thing to say to yourself that you are stronger than this, that you can be beautiful again, to try and motivate yourself.
It's another thing entirely to hear it from someone else.
